


More Wit, a Better Kiss and a Hotter Touch

by prettypaperdoll



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, M/M, Smut, So much smut, Some Fluff, oh my, one-night stands
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-14
Updated: 2015-08-10
Packaged: 2018-03-07 14:13:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 19,174
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3175746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prettypaperdoll/pseuds/prettypaperdoll
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bard is a freshmen in the Dale University Theater Arts program and upon meeting Thranduil, he knows his life will never be the same again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Whew. This took a lot of self-pushing to get this out. I just so nervous when posting in new fandoms. Anyway, I hope you like it! Thank you to Becky for being my lovely beta and all-around amazing lady!

"Excuse me. Can you tell me where building 112 is?" 

The student pointed to a tall red-ish building in the distance. Bard thanked him and continued on his way, shakily looking over the paper in his hand. The scholarship appointment was for one o'clock. Glancing down at his watch, he sighed. He still had forty-five minutes. 

Pure torture. 

Maybe he could go over his monologue one more time. No, he was solid on that. He needed to work on his singing piece. He started for the building previously pointed out to him, humming his song softly as he walked. He hoped there was a music room or something that he could practice in. It wasn't that he didn't know the song or it didn't sound good, he just knew that when nerves took over there was no telling what was going to happen. He shivered thinking about the last school he auditioned for. Everything was going great until the last power note and his voice cracked. 

He'd never left a room so fast. 

There were a few students lingering outside the building and one of them was nice enough to direct him to a room with a piano. 

The piano was slightly out of tune, but it was enough for what he needed. The notes started out timid and unsure at first, then he started hitting the right notes and his confidence grew. Everyone he knew said anything from Rent was a good choice and he took their word for it, but that didn't stop the fluttering in his stomach or the pounding in his chest. He reached the final note that was worrying him and to his surprise, he hit it without any problems. 

"That sounds really good." 

Bard nearly jumped out of his skin. He turned, seeing a very tall, very long-haired guy behind him. He was leaning against the door frame, a smirk playing on his lips. 

"T-thanks. I didn't realize I left the door open." 

"You didn't. I heard someone playing and I thought it was my roommate. You were doing so well, I didn't want to disturb you." 

Bard sighed, nodding. "Appreciate that." He swallowed, suddenly feeling very vulnerable. The guy continued to stare.

"I haven't seen you around. You must be new." 

"Not yet. I'm auditioning today." 

"Oh?" His eyebrows went up "Break a leg. I'm assuming you're auditioning with Professor Balin?"

"Yeah, actually."

The guy smirked again. "Don't let the look of indifference bother you. He's that way even with his favorites. You could recite Hamlet backwards and he would still look like he's bored out of his mind." 

Bard smiled. "Thanks." He shifted in his seat and the guy stood up fully, giving Bard an idea of just how tall he was. The long hair didn't help. It made him look like some kind of lord or a king even. Of course the grey sweater and black jeans brought him down to human level. 

"Well, I should get back to class. It was nice to meet you-?" He held out a long-fingered hand to Bard. 

"Oh, Bard. Bard Bowman." 

"Thranduil."

"Wow, that's-"

"I know, I know. My father's idea."

Bard smiled, tucking a strand of dark hair behind his ear. "I was going to say interesting." 

For a second he thought he saw Thranduil blush, but it was gone as quickly as it had come. 

"Well, thank you. I hope you do well. See you around." He left with a slight wave. 

He waved back, reveling in this random encounter. Looking down at his watch he felt panic grip him. There was only five minutes before his audition. He gathered his stuff and hurriedly left, breaking into a run as he neared the audition room. 

 

Autumn came fast and with it the new school year. Bard excitedly walked up the same pathway he’d walked those many months before, this time as a student of the Dale University Theater Arts Program. He remembered how hard his hands had shaken as he’d opened the letter and how loud he had whooped when he saw that not only was he accepted, but he was getting a hefty scholarship to go with it. Apparently the more Professor Balin looked bored, the more impressed he was. Thranduil was right about that one.

His heart skipped a beat. He'd forgotten all about Thranduil. Now he was going to the same school as him. Maybe even the same program. He smirked to himself, pulling the trap of his bag closer. At least he would know someone. 

The auditorium where the freshman were supposed to meet was quite large. One of the larger ones he'd seen in all his travels to different schools. A few people were sitting on the front row, talking. Actually, they were kissing and talking in between. He cleared his throat loudly and their heads whipped back. 

The girl started laughing. "Whoops. Busted." The guy snorted, turning his head back to the stage. 

Bard made his way down, trying to act like it wasn't a big deal but the smile on his face said otherwise. "It's okay. Didn't mean to intrude." 

"Bound to happen, we are in a public place." 

He sat in the row behind the couple and the girl instantly turned around, offering her hand. She was a rather pretty girl with long red hair. 

"I'm Tauriel. And this is my boyfriend Kili." 

The guy turned slightly, waving. "Nice to meet you." He was a little rougher around the edges, with curly dark hair framing his face and stubble on his cheeks. 

"Nice to meet you both." 

"So, have you been to any of the parties?" 

Bard frowned. "Parties?" 

"Yeah, the juniors and seniors throw them during the summer." 

"Oh. No, I-I haven't been to any of them."

Tauriel smiled. "That's okay. You'll be able to make up for it this year, no worries." 

"How did you guys hear about them?" 

Kili turned his head slightly. "Tauriel is in good with Thranduil, so he invites us." 

Bard's stomach jumped hearing Thranduil's name. "You know Thranduil?" 

She nodded. "Yep. His parties are pretty legendary and when I came for my audition, he invited me to one to celebrate the end of the year. After that, it was just a thing." 

The stomach jumping subsided, realizing how out of the loop he was. "So, I guess you know everyone already, then?" 

"Sort of. Not everyone goes to the parties." She answered. "Don't worry. This program isn't that big. You'll meet everyone by the end of the week and have friends by the weekend, I promise." 

Kili rolled his eyes. "Tauriel just has this obsessive need to be friends with everyone. Ignore her." 

She playfully hit Kili on the shoulder, sitting back down in her seat. "Do not!"

More freshmen were filing in, most looking just as nervous as he was. By the time the last one sat down all of the professors were standing on the stage, among them Professor Balin looking bored as ever. 

An older man with white hair and an impressive beard stepped forward, "Welcome to the Dale University Theater Arts Program! We have an exciting year lined up and judging from the auditions, we have a lot of potential to work with. I'm Professor Saruman. I am head of the Theater department here, but I will also be teaching your main acting classes."

He gestured to his left. "Most of you already know Professor Balin. He will be teaching Stage Production and is in charge of all set productions for each show. You will get to know him as you do your daily work calls."

Professor Balin nodded stiffly. "Hello."

"And on my right is Professor Galadriel." A tall, slender blonde woman stepped forward. A warm smile formed on her lips. "She is your Costuming professor and our costume mistress for all of the shows we put on here."

She held up a hand. "I plan to make slaves out of every one of you." 

Everyone laughed, but Bard tensed up. He was no good at sewing. Hell, he'd never sewn anything in his entire life.

"This is Professor Gandalf. He will be teaching all of your dance classes." 

"I look forward to teaching all of you." He smiled, giving a small bow. 

Bard looked at the professor, hardly sure he could teach anything. He was quite old. Bard couldn't picture him tap dancing, that was for sure. 

"Now, if you all would like to come with us, we can give you a proper tour of where you'll be spending most of your days." 

The professors showed them the black box theater where they would be taking their classes, the costuming room and the dance studio. They stopped by the office where the professor's offices were and they were met with a hunching, sneering boy with long dark hair and an ugly hat. 

Professor Saruman frowned slightly. "Alfrid. Where is Professor Esgaroth? He was supposed to greet the freshmen." 

The boy, now known as Alfrid, pointed to an office. "He had an important phone call to tend to. He sends his apologies." He gave a particularly hateful look to Bard. 

"Ah, well. Professor Esgaroth is your Voice for the Actor teacher. You'll meet him tomorrow. Come this way." 

Bard whispered to Tauriel. "Who's that? Is he a professor?" 

Tauriel snorted. "Not even close. He's a sophomore and Professor Esgaroth's lap dog. He's an asshole to be honest. Just ignore him." 

They filed out of the office and went back to the auditorium, this time back stage. Professor Balin was showing them the shop and tools, reminding them that work calls were mandatory and would show on their final grades if they didn't show. But Bard didn't hear any of this. He was distracted by the sounds coming from onstage. Actually he was distracted by the dancers, one of them being Thranduil. 

His long hair was pulled into a single braid that swished over his bare back as he moved. He was sweaty and panting, dancing lithely to the music. The pants he wore clung tightly to him, accentuating every curve and muscle of his legs. It was mesmerizing. So much so that he didn't hear his name being called. By the time he heard, everyone was staring at him. 

"What? Sorry, I was uhm-" 

"Those are our juniors. They're doing contemporary dancing today." Gandalf noted, pushing past them. "You won't be doing anything that strenuous quite yet. Have to start with the basics first." He smiled at Bard before going on stage. 

The dancing stopped and the dancers broke formation. Thranduil immediately noticed that Bard was staring at him, making Bard look away and pretend to be very interested in a poster on the wall. 

"Hey!" Thranduil called, trotting over. 

Bard put on a smile, acting like he had just seen Thranduil. "Hi." 

"I'm guessing the audition went well?" He was still panting and still sweaty. _Still shirtless_. Bard felt like he should look away. This was turning out to be impossible, however. The more Thranduil tried to fix his already perfect hair and wipe the sweat from his body, the more Bard couldn't help but stare. 

"Uh, yeah. I got a scholarship to go with it." 

Thranduil smiled widely, wiping his face. "Wow. That rarely happens. You must have really made an impact. Professor Balin's pretty hard to impress." 

"I guess so." He turned his head, seeing the other freshmen starting to leave him behind. "I should probably go." 

"It was nice to see you again. I look forward to working with you." Thranduil turned back to the stage, sashaying away. 

_He actually glides,_ Bard thought, worrying his bottom lip with his teeth.

"He's trouble, you know." Tauriel's voice floated from behind him, making Bard jump. 

Bard sighed. "Why do you say that?" 

"Because I know. I mean, I've never been with him. But rumors spread fast around here and they all say the same thing: he's going to break your heart."

He looked back at her, seeing the sincerity in her eyes. 

"I'd keep my distance if I were you." With that, she turned and ran after the group. 

Bard watched Thranduil laughing with another student, wondering what made him laugh. 

It was a few minutes before he forced himself to look away and leave.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Are you sure you know what you're doing?" 
> 
> This made him irritated. "Why are you asking me that like I've started taking drugs?"
> 
> "Because it's like that, Bard. Thranduil is a drug. He will get in your brain and fuck you up."
> 
> Bard scoffed. "You're talking like you know." 
> 
> Tauriel gave him a look.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one was much easier to get out, thanks to my lovely Barduil Buddies and especially TheSnailQueen for being my beta again. I don't know what I would do without you guys. Suffer Barduil feels all alone I guess. -shudders- Anyway, thanks for reading and the lovely comments!

"The week flew by much too fast, what with classes and dancing and preparing for auditions for the first show, Saturday was the most wonderful word he'd ever heard. Tauriel had been right about meeting people; by Friday he knew almost everyone's name and according to her, who to avoid. Kili and Tauriel turned out to be fun to be around, especially with all their knowledge about their fellow classmates. They even knew a thing or two about some of the professors. 

"Gandalf is totally gay." Tauriel said, fixing her hair after Ballet.

Bard scoffed, "No way."

"Way. He's just super good at hiding it. But get a few drinks in him and dear lord he's so flaming he should catch on fire." 

Kili laughed, "It doesn't happen very often, but when you see it, you know. Fili swears he hits him though." 

"I'm sorry, who?" 

"Oh, right." Kili nodded. "Fili's my brother. He's the blonde sophomore you see running around. I'll introduce you at the bonfire on Saturday." 

"There's a bonfire?

Tauriel patted Bard on the head. "Yes, tomorrow night. Thorin's parents have a lot of land and are letting us use it. Interested? I can drive you." 

Bard almost asked if Thranduil was going to be there, but considering Tauriel already warned him about the excess heart-breaking he would experience he decided against it. He nodded nonchalantly "Yeah, sure. I could go." 

 

There were a lot of people that came to the bonfire. The entire freshman class, plus the sophomores and juniors. Most of the seniors came, not including Thranduil much to Bard's disappointment. He ended up having a good time anyway, meeting new people and illegally drinking whatever was being handed out by the older students. About the time he got done with his second beer, Thranduil showed up. 

He walked into the middle of a group and was immediately handed a beer, talking and laughing as if he had been there the whole time. Bard watched from the stump he sat on, the firelight making Thranduil glow a little. He wasn't sure if it was the beer of it Thranduil was actually that pretty. It was infuriating. 

He continued to watch and drink until at one point he found himself wandering across one of the fields. The world started spinning and he had to lie down. It helped a little, but the stars kept swinging back and forth like a strange carnival ride. He closed his eyes for a moment, hoping that when he opened them everything would stop spinning. When he finally did, the stars were blocked by a face.

Thranduil's face. 

"Let me guess. Can someone stop the world and let me off?" He smiled, reaching a hand out to Bard. "Need some help up?" 

Bard sighed, shaking his head. "I think I'll just stay down here for now, thanks." 

Thranduil let out a deep laugh and promptly laid down next to Bard. He could feel the warmth of Thranduil's body through his jacket and had to push down the urge to scoot closer. Thranduil must have read his mind because he did, indeed, scoot closer. 

"So, how was your first week?" He asked, turning his head to look at Bard. 

"Good. Busy." He caught Thranduil's eyes and smirked. There was a look of disbelief that reminded him of when he told his mother that there was nothing to report from school. He sighed again. "I think Professor Esgaroth hates me." 

Thranduil gave another laugh, closing his eyes. "Ah, well, he hates just about everyone. Except Alfrid for some reason. I cannot tell you how much I hate that boy." 

"I'm starting to feel the same way. The way he looks at me in the hallways...pretty sure he's plotting my death." 

"Just don't accept any food from him and you'll be fine." 

They both laughed this time. Bard couldn't help but look over at Thranduil, admiring the way the moon caught his eyes and made them shine a little. 

"See something you like?" Thranduil murmured.

Bard looked away quickly. The deep timber of Thranduil's question made his stomach tighten. "Sorry, I just-" he gulped. "Sorry."

Thranduil chuckled softly. "You didn't answer the question." 

"What?" Bard frowned a little. 

"I asked if you saw anything you liked and you didn't answer." He propped himself on his elbow, allowing him to look down at Bard. "Do you see something you like?" He emphasized the words all the while smirking wickedly. 

The alcohol was certainly making him braver because he sat up a little, bringing himself closer to Thranduil's face. "I was just thinking about how your eyes were shining in the moonlight. I like it." 

Thranduil's eyes were moving back and forth between Bard's eyes and his lips. The heat from his breath washed over Bard's face, intoxicating him in the sweet taste of beer. 

"That's the first time anyone's ever told me that." Thranduil whispered. 

Bard was sure his heart was going to come pounding out of his chest at this moment. Everything stopped; the noise from the bonfire, the crickets, even the wind seemed to die down. Thranduil leaned in more, their lips nearly pressing together when a voice called out in the darkness.

"Thrandy!! Where'd you go? We're about to start some beer pong!" 

Both of them sighed at the same time and Bard backed away. "You better go. They might come looking for you." 

Thranduil tilted his head a little. "Would that be so bad?" 

Bard didn't answer. He wasn't sure exactly how he would feel about being discovered making out in the middle of a field. Thranduil stood up, wiping himself down. 

"See you around fresh." He winked and started back towards the bonfire. 

Bard watched him go, feeling the disappointment settling in his stomach, like a balloon being deflated. Tauriel came looking for him a few minutes later, telling him that Kili was very drunk and needed to go home. 

The drive back was quiet, except for Kili's giggling and make sexual innuendos at Tauriel. She rolled her eyes. 

"He's such a cheap date." She joked, glancing back at Kili. "I can't take him anywhere." 

"Heard that." Kili commented rather loudly. 

"So." Tauriel said, looking back the road. "I saw you had company tonight." 

Bard didn't look at Tauriel. He knew what she thought. What he didn't know was why he felt so guilty. It wasn't like she was his mother and he was disobeying. For the most part, he was an adult that made adult decisions and if that meant getting involved with someone, then that's what he was going to do. 

"Yeah." He finally answered. 

"Are you sure you know what you're doing?" 

This made him irritated. "Why are you asking me that like I've started taking drugs?"

"Because it's like that, Bard. Thranduil is a drug. He will get in your brain and fuck you up."

Bard scoffed. "You're talking like you know." 

Tauriel gave him a look. 

"But I thought-" 

She checked in the rearview mirror, seeing that Kili was passed out before answering. "This was before Kili and I got together. It was just a fling, but it messed me up. I mean, I was actually pining for him. He would go for days without even speaking to me and then out of the blue come over for a booty call. It was torture." She sighed, hands gripping the steering wheel. "Then I met Kili. If it weren't for him, I would still be a crying mess on my bathroom floor." 

He thought a moment. "I thought Thranduil was into guys."

"Sometimes. When it suits his needs." 

Bard didn't know how to respond to that. For a second he felt dirty, like he'd been used somehow. Then he remembered the warmth of Thranduil's body and the quick, but sweet taste of his lips. 

"Can I ask you a personal question?" 

Blinking back to the present, Bard caught Tauriel's eyes. "Sure." 

"Have you ever been with a guy?" 

The question took him by surprise. "N-no. Why is that important?" 

"Thranduil was my first." She said quietly. "Don't tell Kili that, okay? He thinks it was him." She glanced back at Kili again. "I think that's what messed me up so much." 

"So, you're saying-" he paused, thinking. "If I want to be with him, he shouldn't be my first?" 

"I don't think you should be with him at all, but if you're determined to, then yes. Don't let him be your first. It might soften the blow when he decides to drop you." 

Again, Bard stayed quiet. He felt bad for Tauriel, but at the same time he didn't want to give up so quickly. Maybe it was his stubbornness or maybe it was the fact that this was an experience he told himself he _was going_ to have when he got to college. The conversation dropped by the time Tauriel dropped him off at his apartment. 

"Are you going to be okay with him?"

Tauriel smiled. "I think so. I had a lot of practice over the summer. The boy can put away drinks."

"Okay. Thanks for the ride." He turned to walk away, but Tauriel called after him.

"I hope I didn't upset you before. I know we just met, but I don't want to see your first year get fucked up by an asshole who can't keep it in his pants."

Bard smiled back. "I appreciate the concern. Thanks again." He walked to his apartment, digging out the keys. 

That night, he laid in bed, imagining what a full kiss from Thranduil would be like. Probably soft at first, then deeper and more passionate. His head was starting to form a dull ache right behind his eyes, so he shut them. 

 

The weeks following the bonfire were busy enough that Bard was able to not think about Thranduil every second. That was until the cast list for 'Romeo and Juliet' were posted. 

"Mercutio? Really?" Bard asked, staring at his tiny name on the paper. 

"Congrats!" Kili said, clapping him on the shoulder. "Let's see." He dragged a finger down the page, looking for his name. "Tybalt. And Fili got Romeo! And he thought he sucked." 

"What about Tauriel?" Bard asked, using everything in his body to not check about Thranduil. 

"Uhm. Oh. Damn." Kili said, faltering.

"What? Is it bad?"

"No. It's really good actually. She got Juliet." He cleared his throat. "This is going to be awkward." 

Bard stifled his laugh. "That's...unfortunate." 

"What the hell was Saruman thinking? I'm gonna have to go talk to him." He left without another word, heading straight for the offices. 

He couldn't take it anymore. His eyes searched the list, landing on Thranduil's name. "Capulet." He said out loud.

"And here I thought I wasn't going to get a part." 

Bard whipped a look over his shoulder. Thranduil was smiling behind him, hands in his pants pockets. 

"Why do you say that?" 

"My audition was terrible. I'm pretty sure Saruman was just taking pity on me." He explained with a shrug. 

"Doesn't look like pity to me. Capulet is a good part." He turned, facing Thranduil fully. He was wearing a black sweater, contrasting starkly against his hair which happened to be in a messy bun today. 

"It's hard to care when you're so close to being done." Thranduil smiled, moving past Bard to look at the list. Bard caught a whiff of his cologne and as badly as he wanted to just bury his face in Thranduil's neck, he backed up a few steps instead. 

"Mercutio. I'm impressed." He looked back at Bard, a glint dancing in his electric blue eyes. "Looks like you're moving up in the world." 

Bard huffed a laugh. "It might be the only time that happens. Gandalf is planning a dancing show next and I'm an atrocious dancer." 

"You're not so bad." Thranduil said, taking Bard aback.

"How do you know that?" 

"I peek in on the dance classes. You're not as bad as you think." He turned, leaning against the call board. "I could tutor you if you wanted." 

Bard gulped. "Y-yeah, that would great actually. Then maybe Gandalf will stop giving me death glares in class." The ability to be so witty when he was nervous astounded him. 

"We have rehearsal tonight, but maybe after? I have a studio apartment with lots of floor space."

_Is he asking me to come to his place?_ Bard thought, his brain seizing from the panic. He hesitated at first, afraid that nothing but nonsense would come tumbling out of his mouth. Once he regained internal composure, he nodded.

"Sure, yeah, that would be fine. Sure." He knew sounded like an idiot, but it was the best he could do. 

"Are you sure? Because you sound unsure" Thranduil smirked. 

Bard laughed. "Yes, I'm sure." 

"Good. I'll see you tonight, then." 

It took a long time for Bard to tear his eyes away from Thranduil leaving. _Again with the damn gliding_ , he thought, letting out a deep exhale.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thranduil bit his bottom lip, thinking for a moment. "Are you sure you want to do this then?" 
> 
> "Without a doubt." Bard answered without so much as a breath. "Honestly, I would rather be with someone who knows what their doing." Tauriel's face swam to the surface of his lust-clouded mind and the look of concern on her face. He blinked it away, catching Thranduil's eyes again. "I want my first time to be with you."

Rehearsal took forever. It was more tortuous than sitting through one of Esgaroth's classes about people who were too dumb to understand Shakespeare. Thranduil wasn't helping either. He kept stealing glances over at Bard, a smirk curling the corners of his lips. 

_Smirky bastard_ , Bard thought in amusement. 

It wasn't so much that it bothered him; he couldn’t care less about the experience Saruman had with this play and how much it meant to him. As long as there wasn't going to be a quiz about it later, he didn't care. 

It was almost as if Thranduil was more excited about their tutoring sessions than he was, if that was possible. It was all Bard could think about since Thranduil set the date, of which he had to remind himself it was _not_ that. 

"Not a date." He kept saying out loud in his apartment. "He's tutoring me in dancing. That's all. Not a date." 

It didn't stop his hands from shaking or his mouth from dry every time he thought about being in Thranduil's apartment. Alone. And they would probably be touching. It was almost too much to handle. He felt annoyed with himself. It wasn't like he hadn't been with anyone before. Well, in this universe hand jobs under the bleachers didn't count. He felt a shiver of shame run down his back as his mind flashed back to that unfortunate decision. 

Finally rehearsal came to an end and he found himself just standing around by his car. He suddenly wished he was a smoker, so when Thranduil saw him, he didn't look like a moron. 

"Ready to go?" Thranduil asked, all smiles again. 

"Yeah, where do you-"

"I figured we could ride together, then I could bring you back. Unless that's a problem." He tilted his head slightly, the parking lot lights catching his eyes and making gleam. 

Bard shook his head. "Nope, not really. I just need to be back before it gets super late. I have an early class tomorrow." 

"Not a problem. My car's this way." He gestured for Bard to follow him further down the rows until they got to a forest green Jaguar. 

Bard had to physically keep his mouth from dropping. 

"It works much better if you actually get _in it_." Thranduil's voice called from the driver's seat. 

Bard shook his head, sliding onto the cool tan leather passenger seat. The inside was pristine and clean. He could understand; if he had a car like this, food would never see the inside of it. Thranduil chuckled and started up the engine, the purring rumble it produced making Bard smile involuntarily.

"Before you ask, my parents are loaded. I'm a bit spoiled, that's no secret." He reversed, then drove out of the parking lot. 

"The thought never entered my mind." 

"You would be the first." He grinned at Bard. 

 

Thranduil was right about the floor space. Aside from the usual furniture and stacks of books lying around, they could have a party for fifty people. More if the couches were moved out of the way. No wonder they had all the parties here. 

"Is your roommate-" Bard started.

"No. I think he's otherwise occupied tonight. We won't be interrupted." Thranduil put down his bag and headed towards the kitchen. "Can I get you anything?" 

"I'm good, thanks." The art on the wall was distracting him. Canvases of all different sizes lined the wall. Some of them were abstract paint splatters and colors, while others had shape and form. One in particular was of a lovely woman with long, blonde hair. 

"That's my mother. Quite the looker, huh?" 

Bard grinned. "Did you paint all of these?" 

"Most of them. My roommate is an art major so some of these are his works. I just dabble. Acting is more my cup of tea." 

"They're beautiful." 

He looked away from the painting and saw Thranduil eyeing him. That same glint from that afternoon was back, but there was something more veracious about it. Bard cleared his throat and looked around the rest of the apartment. 

"This is nice. You weren't kidding about the space." 

Thranduil nodded. "I love this place. I'll be sad when I have to move out."

It became quiet between them until Thranduil finally moved in front of him. "Want to get started? That early class remember?" 

Bard nodded. "Yeah. Right. What are we going to start with?" 

"What do you feel like you have the most problems with?" He fluidly moved to a stereo perched beside the television. 

"Ballet, mostly. I'm not quite..." he thought of the right word, "graceful enough." 

"It's not about how graceful you are. It's about how much control you have over your body." He turned on the stereo, a classical number floating out of it. "Here, let me show you." Thranduil moved behind Bard, placing long fingers on Bard's waist. "When you have control of this part, everything else falls into place. That's the first lesson." 

Bard inhaled, feeling the pressure of Thranduil's fingers and the hot breath on the back of his neck. "What's the second lesson?" 

Thranduil leaned in closer, "Stop thinking so damn much." 

The words traveled over his ear and down his neck, drawing out goosebumps and a near gasp. His gaze shifted to Thranduil. "Easier said than done." 

"That's what I'm here for. I can help you clear your mind and just go with it. Makes all the difference in the world." 

_Not fucking likely_ , Bard thought, trying to get his mind to focus. He was relived when Thranduil pulled away and stood in front of him. 

"Okay. I'm going to do some of the moves you've been doing in class and I want you to mirror me. I'll tell you what to fix. Ready?" 

They managed to get through the first few positions without any trouble. Once they got to the pirouettes, however, Bard could tell Thranduil was getting frustrated. 

"Look, don't throw yourself around like an ungraceful imbecile-"

"You _just_ told me it had nothing to do with being graceful!" Bard interrupted. 

"I lied. Sue me. But the grace comes from being able to use your core and the leg that is anchoring you. Control, remember? And don't forget to spot." 

Bard put his arms down. "I am spotting!" 

"What are you looking at? Is it a fixed point?" 

"Of course it is!"

"Show me then." He stood beside Bard. 

"The piano, that's what I'm spotting on." 

Thranduil gave him a look. "You need something better than that." 

"Okay, okay. Let me try again." Bard sighed, holding out his arms. 

"Fingers." Thranduil pointed out. Bard adjusted them, trying not to roll his eyes. "Okay, go." 

This time, now focused on his new spot, the pirouette felt solid. He landed it and saw Thranduil beaming. 

"That was much better. What did you spot on?" 

He hesitated. If he told Thranduil the truth, Bard was pretty sure he would get laughed at. 

"Well?" Thranduil pushed, stepping closer.

"I-" he started. "You were my spot." 

It took Thranduil a moment, but he finally got it. He smiled widely, that hint of a blush blooming on his pale cheeks. At a loss for words, he just looked away. 

"I wasn't trying to make you feel awkward." Bard said, suddenly feeling embarrassment. He watched as his tutor turned off the stereo. 

"Of all the things I'm feeling right now, awkward is not one of them." He said over his shoulder. "Quite the opposite actually." 

Bard perked up. "Really?" 

Thranduil turned around, nodding. "Yes. I guess I should confess something." He sat down on the arm of the couch, suddenly very interested in the ring on his middle finger. 

Bard shifted his weight back and forth, his heart beating faster. 

"In truth, I really did want to help you with dancing." His gaze moved back to Bard's. "But I really wanted to spend time with you. Alone. After the bonfire the other night, I just haven't been able to stop thinking about you." At this, he stood up, taking a few steps towards Bard. 

If Bard could see himself, he would probably look like a deer caught in the headlights. Never, not in a million years, not since he laid eyes on Thranduil did he think he would be hearing those words. It certainly caught him off guard enough that he stepped back a little. 

Thranduil frowned, "Did I make you feel uncomfortable just now?" 

"No, nothing like that. It's just-" he inhaled, trying to ease the knot in his chest. "I-I haven't been able to stop thinking about you either. I guess I just didn't think you would feel the same way." 

With every step that Thranduil took, the more Bard's entire lower half tightened up. "Why is that so hard to believe?" Thranduil asked softly. 

"Because. I'm just a freshman. An unexperienced, weird freshman and you're-" 

Thranduil was so close now, he could put a finger to Bard's lips. "You're more than that, Bard. I think, deep down, you know that." 

Bard wanted so desperately to put that finger in his mouth, to taste Thranduil's skin at last. 

"No, I don't." The steadiness of his voice surprised Bard. 

"You should," Thranduil murmured, removing his finger and replacing it with his lips. 

Bard had been right. His lips were soft with a tinge of sweetness that made Bard long for more. With courage he was previously unaware he possessed, he put his hands on Thranduil's face, drawing him in deeper. Thranduil own hands landed on Bard's hips and maneuvered him backwards until Bard's back collided with a flat surface, grunting with the weight of Thranduil's body on his and how the taller boy had instantly started grinding against him. 

"I've thought about doing this since the bonfire." Thranduil panted, using his tongue to lick the line of Bard's lips, earning a stifled groan for his trouble. He smirked, going in for another kiss. "I want you, right here against this wall." He growled, moving his hands to Bard's belt and quickly undoing it. 

A jolt of electric panic made Bard stop Thranduil's hands. "Uhm," he breathed, pushing hair away from his eyes. "It's not that I don't want that. I do. I really, really do." 

"I can tell." The other smirked, squeezing the hard bulge in Bard's pants. 

After biting back another moan, he closed his eyes. "I've just...never-" 

"Are you a virgin?" Thranduil asked. 

Bard opened his eyes, thinking he would see Thranduil smiling in amusement at this awful possibility, but to his surprise, Thranduil wasn't smiling at all. He was as serious as ever. 

"Yes." Bard whispered. 

Thranduil bit his bottom lip, thinking for a moment. "Are you sure you want to do this then?" 

"Without a doubt." Bard answered without so much as a breath. "Honestly, I would rather be with someone who knows what their doing." Tauriel's face swam to the surface of his lust-clouded mind and the look of concern on her face. He blinked it away, catching Thranduil's eyes again. "I want my first time to be with you." 

"Okay." Thranduil said with a nod. "Then we should do this properly." Taking Bard by the hand, he took him to a bedroom, presumably his. It was painted in deep greys and greens. One of the walls had a tree mural, with a single elk in the middle. Bard didn't have a chance to admire it because Thranduil was starting to undress him. 

"The first thing you have to remember is to relax." He said, gently removing Bard's shirt. His fingers made a trail down to the already undone belt buckle, undoing the button and slowly pulling the zipper down. Bard shivered under his touch and the heated gaze of Thranduil's eyes. 

"We can go as slow as you want. I want you to be comfortable." He muttered in that low timber. 

Bard couldn't help the smile. "I would feel better if I weren't the only naked one." 

Thranduil let out a deep laugh, nodding. "Touché." Let’s see if we can’t do something to change that" he gave the younger man a grin, the look promising that this was going to be a night Bard would never forget. 

It was sometime later that they found themselves basking in the afterglow, Bard curled against Thranduil, his head resting on the older man’s chest. They were both intensely aware of each other, so when Thranduil moved to prop himself up on one elbow to look down at Bard, the younger man moved with him, easing back to look up at the blonde with a heavily contented smile. 

Thranduil returned it, leaning down to press a lingering kiss to Bard’s lips "You're welcome to crash here if you want. I can take you to your car in the morning." He murmured. 

The idea was enticing for sure and the thought of leaving right now was just painful, so Bard nodded, trying not to appear too eager "Yeah, if you don't mind." 

Thranduil smirked "I never do."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHEW. I love reading smut, but dear lord it sucks when writing it especially when they are the same gender. Pronouns are a killer. Anyway, thanks to my lovely boo TheSnailQueen for doing some major, major editing and for being my cheerleader in all of it. Thanks for reading!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I want to talk to you about something."  
> Bard sat back in his seat. "Okay."  
> "I had a really good time with you last night. And I hope you had a good time too, it's just-" he paused, exhaling slowly, "-it would be really great if this didn't get around to everyone."  
> Bard blinked. "Why do you think this would get around to everyone? I don't even know what this is."  
> "People talk, Bard. You know that."  
> "Yeah, I do. But what's the big deal. We had sex, so what?"  
> Thranduil shook his head, "It's not as simple as all that."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YES, this took forever to update and I apologize for that. I got distracted with editing and then forgetting and then editing again. Thank you so much for reading and thanks again to my beautiful muse and beta reader Becky. Anyway, enjoy!

The harsh rays of morning came much too early and Bard madly wished he was blind so he didn't have to experience this invasion, but then his eyes popped open upon remembering where he was. He turned his head, seeing a still-sleeping Thranduil on his stomach, mouth slightly open. The sheets were gathered just below his ass, bringing on a flood of memories from the night before. He reached out, softly running a hand over the small of his back. The skin there was soft and cool. His fingers started trailing further down, but then Thranduil let out a muffled giggle. 

"That tickles." He turned over, facing Bard. "What time is it?" 

"A few minutes after seven. I wanted to wake you, but you looked so pretty." He snuggled closer to Thranduil, who pulled him with a free arm. 

"Flattery will get you everywhere." He kissed Bard softly. "We should really get going though. You don't want to be late."

Bard's hand went back to Thranduil's backside, "I'd rather stay here." 

The other rolled his eyes, "As great as that sounds, I also have classes today." He moved Bard's hand and sat up, getting up and heading to the little bathroom. Bard couldn't help but watch his toned legs and ass move across the room gracefully, doing that impossible gliding thing again. The door closed and he was jerked out of his fantasies.

Standing up was a chore on its own; he didn't remember his legs and back being so sore. Bard stretched, yawned and started looking for his clothes. By the time he was fully dressed, Thranduil was coming back out of the bathroom. His hair had been brushed and put into a single plait down his back with a few escaping and framing his face. "Feel free to help yourself to anything in the kitchen. I'm just going to get dressed." He didn't see Bard staring at him until he glanced over his shoulder. 

"What?" He asked, smiling. 

"Nothing. I'm just-I'll go make some coffee." Bard turned to leave the room, hiding his beaming smile. 

"Oh, that's my roommate's coffee maker and it's complicated as hell. I'll stop and get us something on the way to school." Thranduil was pulling on a t-shirt, getting the braid out and letting it hang over his shoulder. 

Bard didn't know watching someone get dressed could be so sexy. It was the way he intricately picked what clothes he was going to wear and how he put them on with ease. Everything he did was a dance, calculated and beautiful. His heart dropped a little at the thought of leaving and going back to his own little world. His boring, clumsy world.

The car ride back was a quiet one. Bard wasn't really sure how to proceed from here and where they now stood. When they reached the parking lot, Thranduil touched Bard's shoulder, stopping him from getting out of the car. 

"I want to talk to you about something." 

Bard sat back in his seat. "Okay." 

"I had a really good time with you last night. And I hope you had a good time too, it's just-" he paused, exhaling slowly, "-it would be really great if this didn't get around to everyone."

Bard blinked. "Why do you think this would get around to everyone? I don't even know what this is." 

"People talk, Bard. You know that." 

"Yeah, I do. But what's the big deal. We had sex, so what?" 

Thranduil shook his head, "It's not as simple as all that."

He felt like he was being patronized. "As simple as what? We shared a night together, why is that so bad?" 

"It's not bad. It's not. I just-" he sighed, almost sounding irritated "-I want to figure out what's going on between us before we tell the world, alright? Can I trust you to not say anything?" 

Bard crossed his arms. "Geez, you make it sound like we murdered someone." 

Thranduil's hand moved to Bard's and squeezed lightly. "Please?" Icy blue eyes kept him pinned to his seat, as if they could see into his very soul and Bard really wished he could do something about how that look made him quite happy to comply with any and all requests Thranduil asked of him. 

"Fine." Bard said shortly, looking out the window. "I guess I'll see you around then." 

"Yeah. At rehearsal for sure." 

Without looking back, Bard opened the door and stepped out. He knew Thranduil was watching him and he so badly wanted to look at him one last time, but he resisted the urge and closed the door behind him. He waited until the roar of the engine was fading before he actually looked back. 

 

"You did WHAT?" Tauriel's face was a little red and her eyeballs were so wide they threatening to come out of their sockets. "You fucking slept with him?"

"Woah, calm down there." Bard said, raising his hands. He moved a few inches back away from Tauriel. "There's no need to get hostile." 

She sighed, closing her eyes. "But I specifically told you not-"

"To get involved, yes you told me." He went quiet for a minute, his mind flashing back to the last conversation he had with Thranduil. "It's not that big of a deal." 

Kili walked in from their kitchen, a bowl of cereal tucked close his face. He slurped a bite down, spooning milk from his chin. "What's the problem?"

Tauriel turned to Kili. "Stupid head over there decided to sleep with Thranduil last night." 

"Oh boy." He said, a mock smile on his face. "Not even a full semester in and there's already drama." 

Bard groaned, pulling a throw pillow over his face. "There's no drama! It was just a thing we're exploring." 

"Is that what he told you?" 

He didn't have to see Tauriel to know that she was giving him a look that consisted of an eyebrow raised and her arms folded. He didn't answer her, but lowered the pillow a little. 

"Of course he would say that, Bard. He got what he wanted out of you and now he's done. Until he's got another itch to scratch." 

Kili frowned at her. "You seem to know an awful lot about this, Taur." 

She cast him a look of offense, "Ugh, no, never. I just hear things, okay? It's no secret that he's a manwhore." 

Bard laid his head against the back of couch. "It's not like that. We shared something last night, something I've never-"

"Yeah. You." Tauriel interrupted. "He had nothing to lose and you had everything."

He shot her a look. "What's the big deal? So I lost my virginity! Don't get your panties in a wad." 

Tauriel's mouth dropped. "I'm going to completely disregard that on account of your mental state." 

"My mental state is fine." He sighed, standing up. She was really starting to tick him off. He walked to the kitchen, opening the refridgertor door for no reason.

"Really?" She followed him. "Because I honestly think you're the most naive person I've ever met. I'm trying to tell you that he's toxic and all you can do is treat me like an annoying fly buzzing around your head." 

"Yeah well, that's about how it feels right now." He slammed the door much harder than he wanted. 

It was Kili's turn to step in. "Okay guys. Stop. Let's just watch a movie or something." 

"No, I think I'm going to go. Thanks though." He moved past Tauriel and Kili quickly, grabbing his bag. 

"Bard, wait." Tauriel called. 

He was out the door before she could say anything else. He fumed the whole way home until he walked into his apartment and suddenly wondered why he was so mad in the first place. Tauriel was just trying to help and in all honesty, she was probably right. After the awkward goodbye this morning, Thranduil barely even said a word to him. He pretended not to notice; he was busy trying to learn his part for the play and didn't need the distraction. But every now and then he would glance up from his script to see if Thranduil was looking at him. 

Not even accidentally. 

He tried to ignore it. Thranduil was busy too and it wasn't like they were dating. They had sex once, they weren't married. That didn't stop the painful pulls he felt in his chest when Thranduil didn't even acknowledge his existence. He wanted to call him. Maybe they could talk it over a little better. Every time he went to dial Thranduil's number, though, his thumb stopped short of actually placing the call. Finally, he just threw his phone on his bed and tried concentrating on his homework. 

It went on like this for several days and the fact that he had told off his friend left him pretty lonely. Kili was still friendly, but only when Tauriel wasn't around which was rare. One night Bard decided to show up early for rehearsals to try and work on his staging, but someone was already on stage. Thranduil was reciting lines out loud. Bard watched silently from the rings, trying to steady the jack hammer pounding of his heart in his ears.

Thranduil was amazing. His stage presence was astounding and every word he said was so natural, it sounded like something he would say. Saruman knew what he was doing by casting him as Capulet; he walked like a king, like nobility. Bard took a step back, realizing that he was being a little bit of a stalker like this, but his escape was thwarted by a couple of lights and a prop sword. They clattered to the ground loudly and he winced, instantly wishing he could turn invisible. 

"Everything okay back there?" Thranduil's voice carried from the stage. 

Bard felt stuck. He could either show himself and confess to watching him or just turn and run. _Don't be a coward_ , he thought. Gingerly he stepped around the mess and out in the light. To his surprise, Thranduil smiled. "Are you spying on me?" 

"Not exactly. I just had the same idea you did." He shifted his weight from foot to foot. "You sound really good by the way." 

Thranduil scoffed. "Please. I sound like a moron. I can't memorize for shit lately." He threw his script on the ground. "How is yours coming?" 

"Not great. I've been uhm...distracted lately." He looked at Thranduil who grinned knowingly.

"I can understand. I've been a bit distracted myself." 

Their eyes met and for a second, Bard forgot all about his loneliness and his anger towards Thranduil. "I know you've been really busy." 

"That's not what I meant." The fire that Bard saw that night and loved was burning in Thranduil's eyes. 

"What did you mean?" Bard asked, suddenly very aware of his tongue. 

"I meant," he started walking up stage a few paces until he was close enough to Bard to push a rogue hair away from Bard's face. "I've been wondering why you haven't called."

The other was taken aback. "But I thought you said-"

"I said I didn't want everyone in the world to know, I didn't mean I don't ever want to see you again." This time he was playing with a few of the dark curls, making goosebumps rise all over Bard's body. 

"I just-" he swallowed. "Didn't want to crowd you. That's all." 

"Incidentally, I'm in the mood for some crowding right now." He smirked playfully, biting down on his bottom lip. 

Bard was about to answer when the auditorium door squeaked open. Professor Saurman came in, trailed by one of his assistants. Thranduil grabbed Bard's hand and quickly dragged him off stage, through a narrow hallway and opened a door to a dark room. 

Before Bard had a chance to speak, Thranduil was pushing him against a wall and going to his knees. 

"Thran-"

"Shhh." He pressed Bard against the wall and kissed him hard. 

"The door-the door's open," Bard breathed, eyes flicking to the door. 

"No one ever comes in here, relax." He kissed him again, his tongue invading Bard's mouth.

They stayed liked that for a few minutes, grinding against each other, Thranduil's nimble hands roving everywhere. Bard was feeling confused and aroused and everything else all at the same time. He didn't know he could feel so many things at once, including the urge to just throw Thranduil on the ground and do unspeakable things to him. Then all too soon, it was over and Thranduil was pulling away, wiping his mouth.

Bard blinked, breathing hard. The awkwardness of the moment took over his adrenaline rush. "So. What are we now? Is this going to be a regular thing or-?"

"Don't think about too much." Thranduil quipped, opening the door. "Let's just have fun and see what happens." With that he left a distinctly sloppy kiss on Bard's lips and walked out, leaving Bard in the dark. 

It took a moment to get full composed before going back on stage, but by the time he got there, an arguement was happening between Thranduil and Thorin, a particularly grumpy junior. 

"Dammit, Thranduil, I know you think that everything is all about you, but you're completely ignoring the blocking!"

"I'm doing it exactly as it's written. Maybe you're the one who can't follow directions." 

"Or maybe you're a stuck up, spoiled brat who won't listen to anyone." 

At this Thranduil launched himself at Thorin, but was quickly stopped by Tauriel and Fili. Bard instantly noticed that Thranduil was much taller than Thorin and would have laughed if the situation wasn't so serious. 

"Enough!" Saruman's voice bellowed from the audience. "If you're done with your asinine cock fight, I would like to get back to rehearsal now. Bard, where have you been? You're late." 

Everyone's eyes were suddenly on him and he cleared his throat. "Sorry, I got-" his eyes flicked to Thranduil, who was seething at Thorin. "I got caught up with something. Won't happen again." 

"I would certainly hope not." He glared at Bard over his glasses. "From the top please." 

Bard ignored the daggers Tauriel was shooting at him. 

 

He managed to make it through a couple of days before calling Thranduil. He felt a little better about it since the random make out incident, but his hands still shook while holding the phone to his ear. It rang a couple times, then he got the voicemail. He hung up before leaving a message. There was a chance that Thranduil was busy with something and didn't want to be disturbed. Bard nervously paced around his apartment, cleaning randomly and opening his pantry door over and over. When he started thinking about rearranging furniture, he decided he'd try to call again. 

Still no answer. 

This was maddening. It wasn't that he wanted to have sex with Thranduil; really he just wanted to hang out with him. Hear his voice and learn more about him. There was still so much he didn't know and he figured if he was going to be sleeping with the guy, he might as well know what his favorite food was or what movies he liked to watch. That same voice came whispering again and it was starting to sound like Tauriel. _'You're getting too involved. Back out now before it's too late'._ Mentally swiping the thought away, he made a decision and stood, grabbing his keys. If Thranduil could surprise him, he could do the same thing. He wasn't really sure what he was doing; this was a bit of spontaneous insanity that he was acting on and Bard wasn't usually one to just act on that alone. His thoughts were usually controlled and examined. But Thranduil did something to him, something that made Bard chuck all his previous inhibitions in the trash. 

By the time he got to Thranduil's apartment, his confidence had grown to the point that he held no hesitation to just running to the door and knocking. Voices mumbled behind the door and he wondered if he would be meeting Thranduil's roommate. The locks clicked and rattled, the door opened, but instead of Thranduil or even his unknown roommate that answered the door, Thorin stood there, frowning. He was shirtless and his hair was tousled every which way. A fresh bite mark stood out from the skin on his collarbone like a bright, red neon sign. 

"Uh, Thran, you have a freshman stuck to your door."


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He couldn't stop thinking about Thranduil. It was as if his mind couldn't quantify him being with anyone else, let alone a jerk like Thorin. He shouldn't have been surprised; Tauriel did tell him. He reminded himself that he needed to thank her for not rubbing it in his face. In his mind, he figured that having a fling with someone was like dating them: you only sleep with one person and that's it. Bard really was naive. That didn't take away from how he felt: cheap and used. It was this thought that finally had him drifting off to an uneasy sleep, Thranduil's face haunted the darkness behind his eyelids.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHEW. I was kind of avoiding this chapter like the plague, but I carried on and I'm quite proud of myself. Thanks to Amelia and Becky for being my beta readers and cheerleaders and amazing friends. I seriously wouldn't have considered going on with you jumping up and down in the metaphorical background. 
> 
> And thanks to everyone reading! Enjoy!

"How long do you think he's going to be out there?" 

Kili are Tauriel were perched on the patio, watching the unmoving Bard. They noticed his car over an hour ago when Kili opened the sliding glass door to let in some air. 

Tauriel sighed. "I don't know. Something bad must have happened. "

"Thranduil?" Kili asked. 

"Probably. I told him. I warned him that it was a bad idea." 

Kili shot her a side glance. "If he ever comes up here, try as hard as you can to not say that, babe." 

"Well-" she started, then faltered. "Okay." 

They waited a few more minutes. Finally, they saw him get out of his car and disappear up the stairs to their door. The knocks were soft and hesitant. Kili answered the door, a warm smile on his lips. There were a lot of things Tauriel loved about Kili; being able to make someone feel better just with a smile or a wink of his eye was one of them. In this case, though, it was going to take one-hundred of Kili's smiles to make Bard happy. He looked as though someone had died. The hair that was usually in a half bun was hanging in his face, which was a little pale. He looked like he could sleep for days and still not be rested. His eyes didn't look up Tauriel or Kili's, but she could see that they were bloodshot. 

"Do you want to come in, man?" Kili asked, stepping aside further. 

Bard didn't answer and for a moment, it looked like he wasn't going to come inside at all. Then he stepped over the threshold, immediately going for the couch. Tauriel hesitated sitting next to him; there was no telling what he needed right now and she didn't want to crowd him. 

"Can I get you anything?" she asked softly. 

"Do you have anything in the form of whiskey?" he murmured. 

Tauriel looked to Kili. "Uhm, yeah, I think so. Do you want something with it or-?"

"Straight." he interrupted.

Kili made a face and went to the kitchen, returning with a bottle of Irish whiskey and a glass. "So, not to be funny but this might be the most cliche drink you could have right now." 

Tauriel shot him a look, shaking her head. 

"Ah, but also a good choice." Kili corrected, opening the bottle and pouring the dark amber liquid into the cup. 

He took the first sip and sputtered, wincing as it went down. He stared at the cup like it bit him. "That is awful. Why did I think it was a good idea?" 

Tauriel smiled, gingerly sitting on the edge of the couch. "We have something you can mix with it."

Bard set the cup down, shaking his head. "No. Thanks though." 

She looked from Bard to Kili, gesturing to start the conversation. He shook his head, frowning. Tauriel insisted with her eyes and her boyfriend finally sighed, sitting next to Bard.

"What happened?" 

"Thranduil happened." his voice wavered involuntarily, making his pain more obvious. As if sitting in his car for an hour wasn't telling enough. 

Tauriel was trying to keep from shouting at him, from knocking him upside his stupid head. She took a deep breath and took Bard's hand. "Did something specific happen?" 

"I went over to his place to talk to him and Thorin answered the door." 

"Oh. That's...weird. I thought they hated each other." Kili said in confusion. 

Bard nodded his head. "I thought so too. Then I saw him standing here, half naked and looking properly fucked and I just-" he put his head in his hands, sighing. "-I ran away. Not to mention he told Thranduil that 'a freshman was stuck to his door' and I felt even more stupid."

Tauriel and Kili exchanged looks. "I'd heard rumors about their...hate fucking." she muttered. 

"Hate fucking? What even is that?" he asked rather loudly. "If you hate someone, why in the hell would you fuck them?" 

She shrugged. "I don't know. It must be a thing for him." 

Bard didn't respond. He just kept picturing Thorin and Thranduil against a wall, fucking like rabbits and insulting each other. It didn't make any sense. 

"Bard, I know this is really difficult. I hate seeing you like this." Tauriel offered, patting his hand. 

There was a small part of him that knew she wanted to scream 'I TOLD YOU SO' over and over. He didn't say that though. He didn't say much of anything. 

The three of them were silent for a moment until Kili picked up the TV remote and it on. A cartoon show was on, which Kili instantly changed. Both Bard and Tauriel were staring at him.

"What? Like you don't watch cartoons." He grumbled. He landed on a cooking show, then a documentary about animals making love in the wild, to which he couldn't help but snort.

"Sorry. That was wildly appropriate for right now." 

Tauriel cleared her throat at him. Finally he got to a comedian doing stand up and he set the remote down. At first, they just sat awkwardly on the couch, only smiling and chuckling a little. Bard didn't pay attention at first. Then Kili started laughing, followed by Tauriel. At some point they ended up snuggled next to each other, laughing hysterically. Some sugary breakfast cereal was brought out and they passed the box between each other. Slowly but surely, Bard was starting to feel better. It didn't take that initial sting away, but he didn't feel like jumping off of a bridge either. 

It was nearly two in the morning when Tauriel yawned and stood up. "I need to get to bed. I have dance in the morning." 

Bard felt a little sad, realizing the fun was over. "Yeah, I should go."

"You should crash here tonight." Kili offered. "Tauriel makes an awesome omlette." 

Bard's eyes went from Tauriel to Kili, then he smiled. "Alright. I'm too tired to drive anyway." 

Tauriel did a little clapping thing, a wide smile breaking out on her face. "I'll get you a blanket and some pillows." She all but leaped to their bedroom.

Kili chuckled. "She likes sleepovers." 

Soon, Bard was tucked in on the couch, staring at the ceiling. He tried closing his eyes, but he kept seeing Thranduil. Then Thorin. No matter how he laid or what other thing distracted him, he still couldn't go to sleep. To put the icing on the shit cake, Tauriel and Kili started moaning and giggling. 

"Geez people." Bard whispered grumpily, plopping one of the pillows over his head. 

He couldn't stop thinking about Thranduil. It was as if his mind couldn't quantify him being with anyone else, let alone a jerk like Thorin. He shouldn't have been surprised; Tauriel did tell him. He reminded himself that he needed to thank her for not rubbing it in his face. In his mind, he figured that having a fling with someone was like dating them: you only sleep with one person and that's it. Bard really was naive. That didn't take away from how he felt: cheap and used. It was this thought that finally had him drifting off to an uneasy sleep, Thranduil's face haunted the darkness behind his eyelids. 

 

Bard did everything in his power to be normal the next day. He smiled and laughed when he was supposed to. He did his work and paid attention in classes. He even gave a little wave to Thranduil as they passed in the hall, which he immediately regretted because the rolling agony of seeing Thranduil again probably made his face look ridiculous. 

"You're only making it worse." Tauriel whispered as they walked to class. "Just don't pay any attention to him." 

"You say that like it's easy. But you know just as well as I do that it's easier said than done." 

"Yes, I do. Which is why I'm saying you should break it off now. Don't try to be nice or try to act like everything's cool." 

He frowned. "So I should confront him?" 

"Maybe? But not until you're sure you won't be seduced again." They entered the classroom, sitting next to each other as always. 

"That was dramatic." He snorted. 

"But you know it's true. One look from him and you're a puddle." she quirked an eyebrow, making Bard roll his eyes. 

"I have self control, Tauriel." 

"Please!" she laughed. "You can't stop him when he's dragging you to a closet, how are you going to resist when you're trying to stand up to him?" 

"In my defense, that was a surprise blowjob and I was totally unprepared."

"Did someone say surprise blowjobs?" Kili sat next to Tauriel, kissing her cheek.

"You would come in right then." She sighed, giving him a full kiss. "That's my man." 

Kili laughed. "You know it." 

Bard snorted. "You guys should know that I heard everything last night."

Tauriel instantly turned a bright shade of pink, trying to hide the hid forming. "It's rude to eavesdrop."

"I didn't have to. I could hear you from the couch."

At this, Kili laughed out loud and hugged Tauriel close. "I tried to get her to be quiet, but she couldn't help it. What can I say?" He smirked and tickled his girlfriend, who was still blushing. "It's not like he's never heard it before."

"Not from me, he hasn't!" Tauriel squealed, punching Kili's arm.

"Ow! Okay, okay. Geez!" He grabbed her arm, holding it away from her. The two of them laughed and Bard sighed. Despite his own woes, he was happy to see his friends in the throes of love. 

At that moment, Professor Esgaroth sauntered into the room smelling vaguely of gin. "Alright, alright. Let's get started. As I said in the last class, your reports are due right as I walk in the class." 

Bard's insides froze. He'd completely forgotten about the paper in all the dramatic turmoil. Tauriel took Kili's and turned to Bard. "I can take yours for you." 

He swallowed and whispered, "I forgot to do it." 

"You're joking." she said, eyes wide. "That's a major grade." 

"I know, I know. I just-" he ran a hand through his hair. "-I forgot." 

"Is there a reason you're talking and not bringing up your paper, Tauriel?"

Her head whipped to the front, "No, sir." She gave one last hopeless look to Bard before getting up. 

Professor Esgaroth cleared his throat. "Well, Bard? Today would be nice." 

"I uh, I forgot to do the paper Professor." 

This produced a very fake, very annoying laugh from the professor. "Surely you're that much of an imbecile."

Bard was getting heated under the collar. "Apparently I am because I forgot about it. I can write it during lunch and bring it to you, if you-"

"Out of the question!" The professor barked. "You knew the rules when assigned the paper and if you can't follow them then I'll have no choice but to give you a failing grade."

"That's not fair!" Bard shouted without thinking. "I told you I can have the paper done. You can't make an exception?" 

Professor Esgaroth stared him down through his greasy tendrils of hair. "If I make an exception for you, then I have to make an exception for everyone."

The class was suddenly very quiet and everyone was staring at the increasingly heated argument happening. Bard wanted to scream and tell Professor Esgaroth how much of a ass he was, but he stood up and stalked out instead. When he was outside, he leaned against the wall, breathing deeply. His hands were clenched into fists, the nails digging into his palms. 

"Everything okay?"

Bard looked up, seeing Fili sitting by a window with a book in hand. They'd only ever spoken in rehearsal, but Fili was nice enough-and aside from the blonde hair, was very much like his brother. 

Bard nodded. "Yeah, I'll be alright. Professor Esgaroth was just ruining my college career, that's all."

Fili closed the book. "Is he threatening to fail you?" 

"Yep. Over a stupid paper, too." 

"Just go talk to Saruman." Fili stood, slinging a bag over his shoulder. "He likes you." 

Bard scoffed. "Hardly. Besides, I don't want to look like a loser that cries over everything. If he fails me, then he fails me. I'll make it up somehow."

 

"Alright." Fili chuckled. "But going to talk to Saruman isn't a loser move. You're being treated poorly and he's a cunt, which Saruman knows."

Bard searched Fili's eyes, seeing just how sincere he was. "Yeah, okay." 

Fili smiled. "I'll go with you, if you want. I have a free period, so-" He shrugged. "I've got nothing better to do. And I would love nothing more than to see Saruman threaten Esgaroth." 

They walked to the offices and waited for Professor Saruman to come back from lunch. The secretary kept looking over her glasses at them. Fili kept smiling at her, making her more flustered. Bard snorted.

"Why are you doing that?"

"If she can stare at us, then I can smile at her." He waved at the woman, who cleared her throat and went back to typing on her computer. "She hates when we lounge around in here." He sighed, taking a seat on the couch. "Are you going to the party this weekend?"

Bard joined him. "There's a party?"

"Yeah, Thranduil's throwing it. Not really sure what for, but it's always a good time."

"Oh. Uhm, I don't think so." He could feel his stomach hardening at the mention of Thranduil's name. 

Fili frowned. "Why not?"

Bard shrugged. "Not really interested in going, that's all. I need to work on my lines anyway." 

They were quiet for a moment, then Fili leaned forward. "If it's because you don't have anyone to go with, you can go with me." 

Their eyes met and Bard smirked. "It's a little more complicated than that."

"Oh?" 

"Yeah, it's just-" he blinked, looking away. "It's nothing. I just know I won't have a good time."

Fili shrugged. "Suit yourself. If you change your mind though." 

Bard was about to say something when Professor Saruman walked into the office. "Hello boys." He pulled a set of keys out of his pockets. "What can I help you with?" 

Bard explained the situation to Professor Saruman with Fili standing behind him. It was an odd comfort having him there. It was like he had backup even though it really had nothing to do with Fili. Saruman listened, nodding his head every now and then. 

"I told him I could do the paper this afternoon and have it in his office before the end of the day, but he wouldn't hear it." 

Saruman gave Bard a wry smile. "Well, he did state the paper would be due at the beginning of class, did he not?" 

"Yes, sir, but-" He glanced back at Fili who nodded him on. "-He didn't say that he wouldn't take late papers. Or that he would fail whoever didn't turn one in on time."

"I see." The professor moved around his desk and sat in the swivel chair. "Let me talk to him and see what I can do. But as you know, Professor Esgaroth can be quite stubborn. If he chooses to fail you, there might not be anything I can do." 

"Understood." Bard said. He nodded his thanks and left the office, Fili in tow. 

"See? He likes you. He wouldn't do that for just anyone." he gave Bard a nudge with his elbow. 

Bard smiled, "Yeah, I guess. Thanks for coming with me." 

"Anytime." Fili replied. "If you are ever in the clutches of Professor Esgaroth again, you can always find me around. I'm kind of a loser that way."

"Loser is kind of a strong word, don't you think?" Bard asked, giving Fili a side glance. 

Fili shrugged, "Maybe."

They walked around the hallways, debating the usage of 'loser' and where it was appropriate and altogether avoiding any kind of responsibility. For the first time in days, Bard didn't feel like he had a weight hanging around his neck. Fili was easy to talk to and there wasn't this pretenious air that he had to suffocate under. It was a shame when they finally had to part ways, but he knew it wouldn't be the last time he would be hanging around Fili. 

 

Despite Tauriel's persistent warnings against going, Bard decided he would go to the party if for no other reason to see Fili there. He was nervous as hell, but he wanted to show Thranduil that he couldn't be scared away. Besides, maybe he would get drunk enough that he wouldn't care. When they approached the familiar studio apartment, music and people were pouring out of everywhere. 

"You okay?" Tauriel asked. She was particularly pretty in a red dress and her long hair in curls. 

Bard exhaled. "Yeah. Fine." 

"If you need to leave, just let me know." she said, putting a hand on his shoulder. 

"I'll be okay. Thanks Taur." 

They walked inside and Bard was instantly handed a red Solo cup full of something that smelled vaguely like rum, but also had hints of vodka too. 

"What is this?" Bard yelled over the din of the music.

"Trash-can punch!" Kili answered. "It's Haldir's famous mix."

"Who?"

"Haldir! Thranduil's roommate!" 

Bard nodded, eyes flitting around the room for Thranduil's face. He saw everyone but Thranduil. Eventually Fili found the three of them and made Bard dance, which was ridiculous, but it allowed him to shake the nerves away and enjoy himself. Soon everyone was joining in and he'd almost forgotten about Thranduil. Until he walked in from the balcony, a laugh on his lips. 

Like magnets, their eyes instantly met and Bard was rendered motionless. Thranduil was as stunning as ever, wearing a fashionable, silver head piece that reflected the light just perfectly and made it glow. He looked like a king more than ever. Suddenly a hand grabbed him by the elbow and pulled him away from the dance floor.

"Wha-where?" Bard stuttered.

Fili was dragging him to one of the bedrooms, smirking. "Come on." 

He tried to break free, but Fili had an amazingly strong grip. "What are you doing?!"

"Distracting you!"

The bedroom wasn't empty by any means, especially the bed. A couple was making out and dry-humping obscenely, but luckily Fili pulled Bard past that to another balcony. 

"Why are you bringing me out here?" Bard asked. His ears rung from the sudden noise decrease. 

"I told you. To distract you." Fili took a sip of his beer. "I saw your face when Thranduil walked in."

Bard didn't look at Fili. "I'm guessing Kili told you?" 

Fili chuckled, "Nah. I just guessed. You're not the only one who's been burned by Thranduil. He's kind of legendary. The sophomores like to call him 'Randy Thrandy' when he's not around."

A laugh escaped Bard's mouth before he could stop it. Then he looked at Fili. "Have you ever-?"

His eyes went wide. "Me? Nah, no way. He's way too pretty for me. I prefer someone a little less-" he thought a moment, "-beauty queen and more down to earth." Fili looked right at Bard when he said this, making Bard blush a little. 

"Look, if any consolation, I think he's a douche. You seem like a cool guy. Why anyone would want Thorin over you-"

"You know about that?" Bard sighed.

"Only that they hate-fuck each other."

Bard lifted his arms exasperated. "There's that phrase again!" He put his head on the balcony railing, relishing in the coolness on his skin. "I feel like an idiot." 

Fili put a hand on Bard's back, patting it. "Don't. It could happen to anyone. He's pretty and talented and has this way of swishing his ass that makes it look like he's gliding, so it makes sense."

Lifting his head from the rail, Bard started laughing. "You've seen that too?"

"Oh yeah. I think he does it on purpose." 

They both laughed this time and when they were done, Fili looked right at Bard. "You want to get out of here?" 

The lights from the city caught a gleam in Fili's brown eyes that made a familiar warmth pool in Bard's stomach. Among the students at the university, Fili was among the more attractive ones. He was different than Thranduil; natural and approachable. Someone you could lay in bed and make stupid jokes with. The thought of having Fili in his bed made him a little giddy. Without thinking about what he meant or about Thranduil or even the dull ache in his chest, he nodded. 

"Yes I do."


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “He was your first, huh?” Fili asked quietly. 
> 
> Bard nodded. “With anyone.” 
> 
> “Oh man.” 
> 
> “I'm an idiot.” 
> 
> Fili scoffed, “No. You're not. You were just looking for the same thing as everyone else.” Fili bent his head to catch Bard's eyes. “Someone who gets you. It's not even really about love or sex or anything like that. Just that person you can sit in silence with and feel completely content.” 
> 
> Bard swallowed. “Yeah.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HOLY HELL. I'm SO sorry this took forever to get out. I had major, major, MAJOR writer's block and I felt like I lost my Mo-Jo on writing at all, so I just put this to the side and quietly pretended it didn't exist. BUT! I went back and read it and decided it needed to keep going. So, here it is and I hope you like it! Thanks for all the comments and encouragements!

Fili assured Bard that the shack of a restaurant they parked in front of was perfectly safe and the food was to die for. It was located near the edge of town and in a place where few other businesses took residence. Weeds sprouted up in all the parking places and cigarettes littered the sidewalk, not to mention the very dark alley right next to the building. Bard could almost see a gang with chains and brass knuckles forming out of the darkness. At least all the letters on the sign were lit up. 

“That's the best choice of words you could come up with?” Bard asked, a little reluctant to get out of the car. 

“Look, my uncle owns the place and I know for a fact that you won't get murdered. Or die of food poisoning. Trust me.” 

He looked at Fili and saw a sincere smile to match his reassuring nod. Finally, Bard shook his head and sighed. “Alright, let's go.” 

“You'll thank me later.” Fili said, opening his door. 

Bard scoffed. “If someone does happen to me, it's you I'm going to be haunting.” 

Despite the scary exterior, the inside was perfectly quaint. It very much resembled a diner one would see in an old movie and any thoughts of impending doom were erased with the overwhelming scents of dough and meat. He inhaled, his stomach rumbling loudly. Without waiting for a waitress, Fili scouted out a booth near the back. An older lady that called Fili by name took their drink orders and promised to return soon. 

Bard looked around, “There are a lot of people here. It's almost midnight.” 

Fili nodded, “I told you, his food is to die for. Plus they're open twenty-four seven, so a lot of the local drunks come get sober.” The woman returned, distributing coffees and waters, then pulled out a pad and pen. 

“What'll it be?” 

Bard quickly opened the menu, but Fili started. “We'll have the midnight special, bacon for me.” He looked at Bard. “Bacon, sausage or hash-browns?”

The other shrugged, “Uh, bacon for me too.” 

Once the woman was gone, Bard leaned forward. “Ordering for me now? Shouldn't that be a couple thing?” 

Fili laughed out loud, “Like I said, trust me. But if you want something else, I can go change it.”

“No, no,” Bard held up his hand, “you seem to be in charge here, we'll go with what you ordered.” Bard was teasing him and thankfully, Fili had a good sense of humor. He felt himself relaxing, the party becoming a distant, unhappy vapor in his thoughts. 

“So.” Fili said, intertwining his fingers together on the table. 

“So?” 

“How's it going so far?” He asked. 

Bard was surprised; Fili wasn't just making small talk. He actually wanted to know how things were going. 

“Fine, I guess. This whole thing with Thranduil has-”

“Forget Thranduil. Pretend he isn't even in the picture. There was a life before him and there will be life after him.” Fili said matter-of-factually and it jolted Bard a little. 

“Well, him aide...everything is good. My classes are going well. I've managed to convince Gandalf I'm a lost cause so he just ignores me. I prefer that way actually.” He chuckled to himself.

“I can help if you want. I'm not the best dancer, but I get by.” 

Bard made a face without even realizing it and Fili nodded. “Ah, right. No private tutoring. Got it.” 

“I'm sorry. I know that your intentions are nowhere near the same.” His eyes turned downcast to the table.

Fili shrugged. “It's okay. I understand. Believe me, I know what it's like to get burned.”

“Really?” Bard looked up at Fili, who for the first time that night wasn't smiling in some way. 

“Yep. Pretty badly too. There's something people don't tell you when you get your heart broken. No matter how much you try to forget, you never really do. Yeah, you move on and things don't look so grim, but they will always be a stain in your mind. It sucks.” 

“Can I ask...?” Bard put out there, hoping to not upset Fili with his intrusion into his private life. They had only just become friends after all. 

“Yeah, it's not a big deal. She used to go to school here, but then she decided she needed 'more of a challenge'.” his fingers made air quotations, followed by an eye-roll. “That was code word for 'I can't stand you and want to fuck whoever I want without you knowing about it'. Anyway, when we first met, it was perfect. She was perfect.” 

Bard stayed silent, waiting for Fili to continue. He could already feel the pain radiating off of the blonde from across the table. 

“But that was just it. She was perfect and everyone wanted a piece. And she gave it to them. I didn't know about it until I came to visit and there she was, jumping the bones of her Lit History professor.” 

“Ouch.” Bard winced. 

“She didn't even notice until I screamed. At least I think I did. Or maybe I threw myself at the dude first? I dunno. Anyway, that was the end of that. My entire freshman year had been crumpled up and thrown away like a bad essay paper.” He inhaled and ran a hand through his long, dirty blonde hair. On his exhale, he smiled. “I told you all that to say that even though I felt like a piece of trash, I kept going. If I quit, it would have been a giant reminder that she won and I was a loser and believe me when I say, that was the absolute last thing I wanted. It took a summer of heavy drinking and Kili picking my ass up off the floor, but I got through it and here I am.” He outstretched his arms, then let them slap down on the vinyl seat. “Don't let him sour your whole experience here. He's leaving next year and Bard Bowman will still be here, making a name for him.” 

Bard tried to smile. He knew Kili was right. But somewhere inside of him, a deep part that longed for actualization and acceptance still felt the deadly sting of Thranduil turning his back on him. 

“He was your first, huh?” Fili asked quietly. 

Bard nodded. “With anyone.” 

“Oh man.” 

“I'm an idiot.” 

Fili scoffed, “No. You're not. You were just looking for the same thing as everyone else.” Fili bent his head to catch Bard's eyes. “Someone who gets you. It's not even really about love or sex or anything like that. Just that person you can sit in silence with and feel completely content.” 

Bard swallowed. “Yeah.”

Fili smirked. “You're not an idiot, okay? Do me a favor, don't say that about yourself anymore.” 

A chuckle left Bard, untwisting the knot in his chest. He nodded, “Okay.” 

“Good.” Fili gave the table a firm slap. “Now, time to have your mind blown.” 

The waitress was coming out with her hands full of food and Bard laughed out loud. 

Later, they were sitting on the hood of Fili's car, looking up at the stars. Their bellies were more than full and both exchanged embarrassingly loud burps followed by raucous rounds of laughter. He felt like he was with his best friend back in Laketown; like he was home. 

“I'm glad you dragged me away from that party.” Brad confessed. 

“Me too. I could tell it was going to be lame anyway.” 

Bard quirked an eyebrow, “Really? It looked pretty jumping to me.” 

“Yeah, they always start out that way, but then most of the people leave and the people who stay get gross drunk or are with their marks for the night.” 

“Gross drunk?” 

“Yeah. You know when you drink too much and you're throwing up everywhere, but no one wants to clean it up so it gets left until the morning. That's gross drunk.”  
Bard laughed, “I have never experienced that, thankfully.” 

“Really? I have. More than once. I don't recommend it.” He sighed, laying down on the windshield and crossing his arms. 

Fili mentioned 'marks' and his mind formed a vision of Thranduil entrancing some girl with hardly any brains in her head all the way to his bed. 

“Don't do that.” 

Bard's head whipped behind him. “Don't do what?” 

“Think about what Thranduil is doing. Or who he's doing. You'll just drive yourself crazy.” 

The dark-haired boy sighed and rested his back on the windshield as well, putting his arms behind his head. “I can't help it. I just know he's with someone that has no idea they're about to go swimming with a shark.” 

Fili snorted. “A shark you'd like to have for your very own.” 

“I know.” He exhaled exasperatedly. 

“Look,” Fili sat up a little on his elbows, “if it bothers you that much then talk to him about it. Let him know that you're not a piece of ass that he can have at a moments notice.” 

Bard looked up at Fili. “Am I a terrible person for wanting that?” 

“Yes. The worst person I've ever met.” The blonde winked. “But know that you're going to feel like this every time he decides to ignore you. You're a grown-ass man and I can't make your decisions for you. You do what is good for Bard. Not Fili or Tauriel or Thranduil. Especially Thranduil.”

“Tauriel. Whew, was she ever right.” 

“Well, experience does that for you.” 

Bard frowned, raising his head up, “You know about her and-”

“Please.” He rolled his eyes. “I was the first one she came to.” 

“Geez. Does everyone know except Kili?” 

“Probably. She told enough people. I think she was trying to generate enough sympathy that everyone would hate Thranduil.” 

Brad relaxed his head, looking back up at the stars. “I can see that plan going bad really fast.” 

“Yep,” Fili said, laying back down. Brad wasn't sure if it was his imagination or if it was real, but he could swear that Fili was laying closer than he was before. “Thran is a class favorite. Hell, he's everyone's favorite. When she told me, I was like, 'Girl you messed up'. But! Then she met Kili and everything that blonde beauty queen did to her went right out the window, thank goodness.” 

Bard smiled. “They are pretty cute together.” 

“Ugh. They're disgusting.” Fili grimaced. “But she makes him happy and her in return, so I keep my complaining to a minimum. Except when they have sex on my couch and then that's the last straw.” 

This made Bard laugh out loud and much harder than he had intended. 

“I'm guessing you've been exposed to their humping as well? They're like rabbits, I swear.” 

“I haven't seen it, but I've heard it,” Brad managed to reply, finally getting his breath. “He was quite proud of it.” 

“Of course he was, the horn dog. Probably did it on purpose to mess with you.” 

Bard snorted, “Probably.”

The chuckles died down and it got quiet between them, but there was no awkwardness felt from both parties. In fact, Bard was so comfortable that his eyelids were starting to droop. It was only when Fili was shaking him that he realized he'd fallen asleep on Fili's shoulder. He sat up suddenly, clearing his throat. 

“Sorry, I-”

“Don't apologize,” Fili said softly, sitting up as well. “It happens.” 

Their eyes met and for a brief moment, he thought they were going to kiss, but then Fili was hopping off of the hood. “I'll take you to your car.” 

Brad blinked and slid off the hood. “Yeah, thanks.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You’re unbelievable, you know that?” Bard’s voice was quiet now, his eyes searching for some kind of humanity in Thranduil’s face.
> 
> “Don’t do that. Don’t make me into some monster. Tauriel knew what she was doing and so did you.” He came close to Bard. “I asked you if this is what you wanted and you said yes. You had every opportunity to turn around and leave.”
> 
> “So this is my fault, huh?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, two chapters! I'm feeling pretty awesome! It's getting all angsty up in this mother, but I just can't help myself. Thank you for reading and thank you for the AMAZING comments. You guys are awesome!

The next few weeks seemed to flow by a little easier after his evening with Fili. It was as if a shot of adrenaline had been injected into his self-confidence because every time he saw Thranduil, he didn’t feel sick to his stomach. Even during rehearsal when they had a lot of down time, Bard didn’t feel the urge to go sit next to him and stew. For the first time that year, he didn’t feel like a scared little freshman. He was memorizing his lines and impressing Saruman, making it to classes and for the most part, he was making good grades. Professor Esgaroth was still giving him a hard time, but his talk with Saruman must have done the trick because he didn’t get a failing mark for having a late paper. The grade he gave was atrocious, but it was better than nothing. Bard also found himself spending more and more time with Fili, to which Tauriel and Kili heartily approved. Bard wasn’t all-too sure where their relationship was going. Part of him didn’t want to worry about it too much; he was having a good time with Fili and he didn’t want his lizard brain to get in the way of that. 

There was the other part of him, however, that was intensely curious. Sometimes they would sit together in rehearsal and giggle about stupid things, then spend the rest of the night texting back and forth. Meals at the pancake house were becoming a regular event and Brad looked forward to their late-night chats on the hood of his car. They had gotten closer that was for sure. Not to mention the moments of silence when they would look at each other, the tension rising in waves that it could have drowned them. Nothing came of it, much to Bard’s dismay and every night ended the same way; being dropped off at his apartment and a wave from his balcony. 

To be perfectly honest, Bard wasn’t even sure he wanted to be in a relationship. He very much liked Fili, he was sure about that. But the other stuff was confusing. He’d never been in a relationship with a guy before. Everyone knew Bard was gay, so that wasn’t the problem. He very distinctly remembered coming out to his parents and even though his mother cried, they promised to support him in whatever choice he made. 

The real question stirred in Bard’s mind every time he looked into the handsome blonde's eyes: Was Fili gay? 

He finally got the courage to step up and ask after rehearsal one night, but his bravery deflated faster than a birthday party balloon. He saw Thranduil sitting on the trunk of Bard’s car, swinging his legs. Bard didn’t even think that was possible. He tried to act cool as he got his keys out of his pocket. 

“What’s up?” 

Thranduil peered over his shoulder, “What’s up with you?” He stepped off the trunk and came around to stand next to Bard. His hands were in his pockets and despite his height, he looked a little small.

Bard shrugged, “Nothing. Going home.” 

“Ah.” Thranduil nodded, rocking on the balls of his feet awkwardly. “So, are we not talking anymore?” 

Another shrug. “No. I’m perfectly happy to talk to you.” 

“Really?” Thranduil said incredulously. “Because you’ve been avoiding me ever since you came to my house that night.” 

“Which night?” He knew perfectly well which night; Bard just wanted to hear Thranduil say it. 

“That night Thorin was at my house.” Thranduil’s voice was playful, but his eyes were cold. “You didn’t give me a chance to explain.” 

“Explain what?” Bard asked, opening the car door and tossing in his backpack. “We’re not dating. You don’t have to explain anything. I mean, don’t get me wrong it was weird to see him there after you two fought, but other than that-“ he shrugged again. The shrugging was becoming a bit much, but apparently his way of being cool was being indifferent. 

“So you weren’t upset? Thorin said you ran away as soon as he opened the door.” Thranduil quirked a perfectly maintained eyebrow, smirking. 

Bard wanted to punch him.

“What do you want me to say, Thran? That I was upset that you were with someone else, so I ran home and cried myself to sleep? I was surprised and I didn’t want to interrupt, so I left.” He leaned against the car nonchalantly, feeling the blood churn in his veins wildly. 

Thranduil sighed, returning a shrug, “I thought you’d want to talk about it.” 

Bard barked a short laugh, “While Thorin was there? Yes, that would have been fun. ‘Hey Thranduil, how’s it going buddy? Oh, right, you’re in the middle of fucking someone you hate. That’s okay, I’ll just wait out here.’ Please.” The disdain in his voice was heavy and he knew Thranduil could hear it. The smirk on his pretty face faded and his eyes became icy. 

“Don’t be an asshole, Bard. It doesn’t suit you.” 

Bard looked at him, frowning. “I’m not being an asshole. I’m protecting myself.” 

Thranduil narrowed his eyes. “From what?”

“From you!” Bard said, much louder than he intended. 

“From me?” The other said, looking genuinely shocked. “Why the fuck would you need protection from me?” 

“Because!” Bard shouted. “Because you’re a player and you break people’s hearts for fun!”

It was Thranduil’s turn to laugh humorlessly. “You’ve been spending too much time with Tauriel.” 

“Leave her out of this.” 

“What has she said about me?” Thranduil asked, a wicked grin on his lips. “That I slept with her and then ignored her? Did she tell you the part about how she called me eight times a day? Or how about the times when she would randomly show up at my house so we could ‘hang out’? Bard, she was nuts okay? I told her it wasn’t going to work and she went completely insane.” 

Bard’s mouth dropped open. “Are you serious? She gave you her virginity! All she wanted was to be with you!”

“Gave!” Thranduil shouted back. “The optimal word here is ‘gave’. I didn’t make her! I didn’t steal it!”

“You’re unbelievable, you know that?” Bard’s voice was quiet now, his eyes searching for some kind of humanity in Thranduil’s face.

“Don’t do that. Don’t make me into some monster. Tauriel knew what she was doing and so did you.” He came close to Bard. “I asked you if this is what you wanted and you said yes. You had every opportunity to turn around and leave.”

“So this is my fault, huh?” 

Thranduil stepped back and pinched the bridge of his nose. “This isn’t anyone’s fault, Bard. What the hell happened? I thought we were having a good time! Just having fun! And now it’s this melodrama where you think I’m some man-whore and all your little friends just feed that into your brain one little lie at a time.”

“What happened is I woke up. I realized that this-“he motioned between the two of them “-wasn’t ever going to happen. So I stopped dreaming. I found someone who gets me.”

Thranduil’s jaw set. “I should’ve known better.” 

“Yeah me too.” 

The two stared at each other for a moment, then Thranduil looked away. “I hope Fili makes you happy.” 

Bard was taken aback by the softness of Thranduil’s voice. “Thanks.” 

The silver-haired beauty turned, heading for his car. Then he stopped and looked back at Bard. “I really cared about you. I know you have this image of me in your head now, but I promise I never wanted to hurt you.” 

For a moment, Bard thought he was going to break down and cry. Instead he turned away from Thranduil and got in the car, refusing to look at him again. It wasn’t until he heard the roar of Thranduil’s engine that he put his head on the steering wheel and sobbed. 

He wasn’t really sure why he decided to go to Fili’s house at two in the morning. Chances were that Fili was fast asleep. Bard’s heart thrummed in his chest like the bass of a speaker, filling his ears with the steady rhythm and beat. Shakily, he got out and went up the walkway Fili’s apartment. There was a second before the initial knock that he thought about turning around and going home, but then knuckles met metal and it was too late. 

Bard was about to leave when the door opened and he came face-to-face with a sleepy eyed, mussed-haired Fili. His eyes were barely open. He was also shirtless. 

“Bard?” 

“Hey.” 

“What’s up? Is everything okay?” Fili rubbed his eyes.

“Yeah. I guess. Not really.”

Fili instantly stepped aside. “Come in, come in.” He shut the door and as soon as the latch clicked, Bard pushed him against the door and kissed Fili hard and fast. When he pulled away, Fili was staring at him, unblinking. 

Bard breathed out, “I’ve been wanting to do that for a long time.” 

Fili stayed silent, still staring at Bard. 

A wave of embarrassment and anger rolled over him and he closed his eyes. “I’m sorry. I just-“he growled, turning away and covering his face with both hands. He was trying not to break down again and he wished to the gods that Fili would say something, anything to end this pained silence and tell him-  
Then he felt strong hands turning him around and prying Bard’s hands away from his face. A small smile was on Fili’s lips. 

“It’s okay. I have too.” 

Bard nearly cried out in relief when Fili kissed him. It was strong and sure, something Bard desperately needed right now. Fili’s hands were on Bard’s waist, pushing him to the couch and sitting him down. Bard’s nerves were electrified and his heart thudded wildly in his chest. Thankfully, Fili plopped down next to him and continued kissing him, his fingers threading through Bard’s hair. He was perfectly content with staying like this for a very long time and Fili echoed that wish because they did stay that way until their lips and throats were dry. 

“I should probably go,” Bard croaked, licking his lower lip. 

Fili grinned. “You don’t have to.” 

“I know,” the other nodded. “I just don’t want to go too fast, you know.” 

“I understand. But just so you know, I wasn’t planning on having sex with you.” He chuckled. “I just happen to like cuddling a lot.” 

This made Bard laugh. “You would be a cuddler.” He gave Fili one last hard kiss on the lips before forcing himself to stand up. “Okay, I really need to go before I change my mind.” 

“Yeah.” Fili stood up with him and walked him the short distance to the door. Upon opening it, Bard turned, “So, are we just…having fun?” The phrase echoed in his mind from his argument with Thranduil. 

Fili frowned. “Well yeah. But I want to have fun with you on a more official basis.”

“Like…dating?” Bard felt so incredibly naïve.

“Yeah. Is that okay?” Fili’s eyes were wide and amber in the porch light, making Bard’s heart melt a little.

“Yes, it’s more than okay.” 

Fili gave Bard a final kiss. “Good. I’ll see you tomorrow then.” 

Bard could have flown to his car. He felt so light and happy and everything in between. He kept replaying Fili’s first kiss over and over in his head as he drove, a stupid grin permanently glued to his face. When he pulled into his parking spot, however, it faded like someone came and wiped it with a dry-eraser.

Thranduil was sitting on the steps leading to his apartment.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fili obviously cared about Bard, so what was the problem? He knew too well what the problem was and it had to do with a tall, silver-haired jerk. Sliding into his bed, he couldn’t help but muse on how much that said jerk really messed things up for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am on a roll! Thank you all so much for the kudos and comments; you are the cheese to my macaroni and I love every single one of you. Hope you enjoy and feel free to comment or share!

Bard desperately hoped it was his exhaustion that was conjuring up visions of Thranduil sitting on the stairs. And looking quite pitiful. Despite his elation of the new, blossoming relationship with Fili, his heart sunk when he parked and Thranduil instantly stood up, hands stuffed in the grey hoodie he was wearing. 

He wasn’t a vision at all. 

Taking a deep breath, he turned off the ignition and opened the door. 

“I thought you’d never come back.” Thranduil said instantly, a smirk playing on his lips. 

Bard wished that he could just ignore the obviously sulking, puppy-eyed man standing in half shadow. Try as he may, that wasn’t something he could bring himself to do. Instead he closed the door and stared at Thranduil. 

“What are you doing here?” 

“I-“the other started sheepishly, “-I wanted to apologize. I tried to go home and sleep, but I kept thinking about what you said and I just had to see you.” 

“It’s three-thirty in the morning.” 

Thranduil smiled. “I know. And I’ll leave if you want me to, but I know you don’t want to leave things the way they are.” 

Bard forced himself to break eye contact and focus on his keys. “And how are things?” 

“Pretty shitty.” He could hear gravel shift as Thranduil took a closer step. “Even if we aren’t involved in any way romantically, I still want to be friends.” 

This made Bard look up. “Really?”

“Yes.” Thranduil was standing in light now, the street lamp giving him an ethereal glow. It was maddening how gorgeous he was. “I think you’re more than a late-night booty call, Bard. You’re funny and talented   
and so smart. I enjoy watching you work. In case you didn’t know I’m probably your biggest fan.” 

“Funny,” Bard said, trying to ignore the sudden skipping in his chest, “you have a weird way of showing it.” 

The older boy took a step closer. “I know. And that’s what I came to apologize about.”

Bard waited. This was a gift that he was sure wasn't usually given by Thranduil, so he didn't want to interrupt in any way. 

“I’m sorry for being such a dick about the whole thing. I guess I was so attracted to you from the get-go, I couldn’t get my brain to function on ‘normal’ when I was around you. I just had to figure you out.”

His heart was at a gallop now. Bard swallowed, “You know you could’ve figured me out without-“he paused trying to find the right words.

Thranduil threw that annoyingly smug smirk at Bard. “Come on. You can’t tell me you didn’t like it.”

“That’s not-“Bard started to argue, but Thranduil interrupted.

“I know, that’s not the point. The point is I hurt you. And I’m sorry.” 

The glint of Thranduil’s cold, blue eyes made Bard feel that familiar pool of warmth in his stomach again. “It’s okay.”

“Good.” Thranduil’s face broke out in a smile. “So, we can start to be real friends now?” 

“What does that entail, exactly?” Bard asked, a little worried this was some façade to get Bard in bed again. 

“Not having sex.” He replied, as if he read Bard’s mind. “Hanging out, watching movies, going to bars and being each other’s wing-men. I dunno, normal dude stuff.” 

Bard couldn’t help smiling at that. “I never took you for a ‘normal stuff’ kind of dude.” 

The other laughed out loud. “I’m not. But we’ll figure it out.” Thranduil removed a hand from his hoodie and held it out to Bard, as if they need a physical gesture to seal their new arrangement. “All good?” 

Bard hesitated a moment before taking Thranduil’s hand, but he finally did and they shook. 

"I’ll go then and let you sleep.” He moved past Bard, still smiling. Bard turned to watch him go, noting the lingering warmth on his palm where they’d shaken hands. A thought struck him and he called out to Thranduil before he could stop himself.

“Yeah?”

“I’m dating Fili now.” Bard stated, the slight tone of a warning in his voice. For a split second, he thought he saw a flash of sadness in Thranduil’s eyes. But then he smiled.

“Congrats. Like I said earlier, I hope he makes you happy.” Thranduil turned and walked the rest of the way to his car, got in and drove away all while Bard watched. 

Doubt and guilt crept their way into Bard’s head as he tried to sleep. He couldn’t help the nagging feeling in the back of his mind that Thranduil had some ulterior motive, some deceptive scheme to make him miserable. But of course, Bard was too trusting to a fault so he had to take Thranduil’s word that he really just wanted to be friends. He was on his way to sleep when Fili popped in his mind. The sudden feeling of dread hit him like a bag of bricks. He hoped that Fili would be understanding. In fact, he knew Fili would be understanding. What would he have to be upset about anyway? It wasn’t like he’d slept with Thranduil again. No, it was just an innocent gesture to make things less dramatic around the Theatre department. Bard sailed off to sleep with that thought in mind. 

Fili instantly found him the next morning at school, immediately intertwining their hands as they walked. All the anxiety Bard felt from the night before melted away and he smiled at Fili. 

“Morning.” Fili said, beaming brightly. “How did you sleep?”

“Alright.” It was all he could manage to get out before spilling the whole thing about Thranduil’s visit. He would tell Fili eventually if his stomach every stopped flipping every which way. 

Fili frowned. “Is something wrong? You look a little…strained.” 

Dammit, he thought. Nothing got past Fili, even with Bard who thought himself a rather good actor. 

“Nothing. Just-“he started, figuring now was as good a time as any to tell him about Thranduil.

Right at that moment, the devil himself started up the path to the main building and smiled widely at Bard and Fili. “Morning love birds,” he cooed, winking at both as he passed. 

“That was weird.” Fili commented, his frown deepening. “How does he know already?” 

Bard swallowed, “Because I told him.” 

“Really? When?” The look of confusion on the blonde’s face was a little disorienting to Bard. He could see the cogs working behind Fili’s eyes, trying to piece together why Thranduil would know before his own brother.

“Last night. After I left your place and went home, he was waiting for me at my apartment.” 

Fili’s grip loosened on Bard’s hand. His face became hard, the wrinkle of his brow giving Bard the impression of a lion. “And?” 

“And we made amends. He apologized for being a jerk and said he wanted to be friends. Real friends. So I informed him that we were dating. I hope that was okay,” he quickly inserted. “I wanted him to know so he’d keep him from trying to flirt or anything.” 

The hardness and wrinkles softened in Fili’s face. “Good. I was worried you made amends some other way.”

For a moment, Bard was a little hurt by Fili’s confession. Then he realized that it had been Fili that had taken the brunt of his pining for Thranduil, so his hurt turned to understanding. “No, I wouldn’t. Not after what happened with us.” He squeezed the blonde’s hand and gave him a reassuring smile. “I wanted to stop churning the water so we could survive the year.” 

“Good idea. I don’t blame you.” Fili said, finally smiling again. He sighed, tugging on Bard’s hand. “Let’s go get some breakfast. I’m starving.” 

It took a full minute for Kili to see Bard and Fili holding hands in the breakfast line before putting together what was happening. Then his eyes got very wide and his mouth opened, but no words came out. 

“Taur, come here!” Kili said in a half-shout, waving her over frantically. 

A bleary-eyed Tauriel sat beside Kili, coffee in hand. “Honey, you realize you’re shouting right?” 

“I know, I know, but look.” He nodded over at Bard and Fili.

“They’re joining us for breakfast?”

“No, look.” He pointed at their joined hands. 

Tauriel blinked a few times, then her face transformed into the same expression of pure joy. 

Bard caught a glimpse of the two over Fili’s shoulder, nudging him gently. “What’s the matter with them?” 

Fili turned his head, “I have no idea.” 

It wasn’t until they sat down and Kili’s eyes were still wide with some strange wonder that Bard realized they’d seen Fili holding Bard’s hand. He blushed a little, digging into his food. “We’re not the eighth wonder of the world, Kili. Stop looking at me like that.”

“Use your words, bro.” Fili said, smacking Kili’s arm rather hard.

Kili yelped a little, holding his bicep. “Sorry, we’re just stoked it’s finally happening.”

Bard looked up, his eyes moving between Tauriel and Kili. “It?”

Tauriel sighed, exasperated with Bard’s cluelessness. “Yes, you and Kili. We were wondering how long it was going to take. I mean you spend every waking moment together so it was only a matter of time.” 

“We do not spend everything waking moment together.” Fili scoffed, starting in on his own plate.

“Oh please.” Tauriel rolled her eyes. “Anyway, I’m glad it finally happened. Now we can forget about whats-his-face and move on.” 

Bard snorted. “Taur, he’s not Voldemort.” 

“Might as well be,” she grumbled. She took a sip of her coffee, eyeing Bard over the top of her cup. 

“Well, we have to be nice because he and Voldemort made a peace treaty.” Fili announced, sounding reasonably serene about the development. 

“Really?” Kili asked, looking a little surprised. “I thought you hated him.”

“Hate is a strong word.” Bard answered. “It was an extreme dislike. But he has apologized, so I figure why not? I can do with a little less drama in my life, thanks.” 

Kili shrugged, “Fair enough.” Tauriel on the other hand, looked unconvinced. Thankfully, she kept her opinion to herself and went back to gushing about the new couple. 

 

As promised, any time Thranduil was around Bard, the flirting was kept to a minimum. Every now and then a wink or a bedroom smirk would be tossed his way, but Bard chalked it up to just being Thranduil’s nature. Of course someone that beautiful couldn’t help being a little flirty. Besides, he was too distracted with school and Fili to be charmed by his wiles. Still, there was that occasional butterfly that liked to flit around Bard’s stomach when Thranduil walked by. 

Fili on the other hand, was becoming increasingly flirtier and more affectionate. Their hugs between classes turned into kisses and their late-night make out sessions became increasingly more difficult to leave at the end of the night. He knew Fili wanted more; hell he wanted more but he wasn’t sure if he was ready to give in to those desires yet. Luckily, Fili was both generous and patient. He never begged or bargained for sex, which made Bard fall for the blonde even more. Any time things got too heated, they would take a break and watch a movie or start up a random conversation to distract themselves. Of course, they ended up right back where they started.

“This is getting ridiculous,” Fili said breathlessly one night. Bard was straddling his lap, fingers tangled in his mane of hair. 

“Which part?” Bard asked, his red, swollen lips smiling. 

“This.” Fili kissed him softly, his hands trailing from Bard’s waist to his hips. “I mean, I love this. I love-“he stopped suddenly. “kissing you.”

Bard faltered a little, “But?”

“But nothing. I’m thinking too much.” He went to kiss Bard again, but Bard pulled back slightly.

“But you want more?” 

The deep lust behind Fili’s brown eyes was devastating and Bard sorely wished he could help slate that, even just a little. “Fili, I-“

“You don’t have to explain. I understand. I’ve just got a lizard brain, that’s all.” 

Bard laughed. “Well to be fair, I am sitting on your lap and we have been basically dry humping for the past hour.” 

“True.” Fili returned the laugh, pushing a few hairs behind Bard’s ear. “I just-“

“I know. Believe me, I know.” He gave a little wiggle of his hips, feeling Fili’s hardness digging into his inner thigh. 

The blonde groaned and practically threw Bard off of him. “You’re so awful!” 

Bard landed beside him in a fit of laughter, but also trying to hide his own arousal. “I’m sorry, I couldn’t help it.” 

“Liar.” Fili growled, cutting a look of faux annoyance at the brunette. Then he exhaled and nodded. “So, a movie then?” 

“Definitely.” Bard agreed heartily. “Scary or action?” 

“I can go for a scary movie.” 

They managed to get through the movie without falling onto each other’s laps, which relieved Bard to no end. It felt good to just snuggle under a blanket; no pressure or guilt to perform. He was staring to drift off when he felt Kili’s hand move farther up Bard’s leg. The brunette’s eyes popped open, but he stayed still. Further still the hand moved and Bard couldn’t help the gasp that left his mouth. 

This should stop, Bard thought, but his body was having different ideas. The arousal was back and somehow his hips were involuntarily moving so that Fili could gain more access. He could his hear his heart racing; or was that Fili’s? Bard tried swallowing, but his throat was dry. The moment Fili’s hands danced over his crotch, his head came off Fili’s shoulder and the hand skittered away quickly.

“I’m sorry-“

“No, it’s-“

“I just-“ 

They stammered over each other for a few more times and then they were quiet. Bard opened his mouth to speak again, but Fili started first.

“I don’t want to pressure you and I’m sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable.”

Bard sighed, shaking his head. “Please don’t apologize. I should be the one to apologize. I’ve been teasing you for weeks now without any kind of…relief. I’m a douche.” 

Fili snorted. “No you’re not. Like I said, I understand why you’re hesitant. The last time you slept with someone, it ended up turning into a soap opera. I want to be with you and if you’re not ready for sex, I’m not either. I might have a lizard brain, but I also have self-control.”

“Thank you. I want you to know that I don’t think you’d take advantage of me. Like…Thranduil did.” He hesitated on the name, not wanting to cloud the air any more than it already was. 

“I’m glad. I couldn’t ever do something like that to you. I care about you too much.” Their eyes met and he kissed Bard deeply. 

The night ended with Bard waving to a departing Fili and afterward, relieving himself in the shower with thoughts of being with Fili as he had done on nights previous. He felt like a coward. Fili obviously cared about Bard, so what was the problem? He knew too well what the problem was and it had to do with a tall, silver-haired jerk. Sliding into his bed, he couldn’t help but muse on how much that said jerk really messed things up for him. Checking his phone, his heart dropped seeing he had a few texts from Thranduil. One was inquiring into how he was doing. The second was a picture of a stupid meme from the internet. But the third one was enough to make Bard sit straight up. 

I can’t stop thinking about you. 

He must have read it ten times before he turned his phone off and threw it across the room with a grunt. 

Silver-haired jerk indeed.


End file.
